8 Ways to Improve A Young Basketball Player's Confidence

Summary: Many coaches try to inject confidence into players with pep talks and praise, but sports psychology shows that lasting confidence comes from building competence through small wins, teaching positive self-talk, and creating environments where mistakes are learning opportunities, not threats.

Throughout my playing years, I lacked the confidence to believe I belonged on the court with anyone. I went through the motions, played it safe, and never truly tested what I was capable of. It wasn't until I started playing recreationally after graduation—when the pressure was off and the stakes were low—that something shifted. I discovered I could actually hold my own. I could compete.

That realization hit me hard: I had wasted years doubting myself when I had more in me than I ever realized. And that's one of the main reasons I went into coaching. I wanted to help players who struggle with confidence learn they can do more than they think. I strive to teach them how to expect more of themselves before the opportunity passes them by.

Confidence isn't just a nice-to-have in basketball—it's often the difference between a player reaching their potential and watching it slip away. Here's what research and experience have taught me about building genuine, lasting confidence in young players.

Understanding What Kills Confidence First

Before we talk about building confidence, we need to understand what destroys it. Sports psychologists identify six major confidence killers that plague young athletes:

1. Self-doubt - Questioning abilities and preparation
2. Fear of failure - Playing not to mess up rather than playing to succeed
3. Unrealistic expectations - Setting unattainable standards that guarantee disappointment
4. Negative self-talk - The critical voice that tears players down
5. Perfectionism - The impossible pursuit that highlights only mistakes
6. Seeking social approval - Basing confidence on what coaches, parents, or teammates think

Youth sports psychology experts note that high expectations from parents and coaches, perfectionism, doubt, criticism, and fear of failure top the list of confidence busters for young athletes. Kids who lack confidence often derail their own success, play tentatively, experience trouble bouncing back from mistakes, and engage in negative self-talk.

Understanding these confidence killers helps us avoid accidentally creating them while we're trying to help.

8 Evidence-Based Ways to Build Lasting Confidence

1. Help Them Set Process Goals, Not Just Outcome Goals

Research shows that unrealistic expectations serve as distractions and continually lead to doubt, frustration, and drops in confidence. When players focus solely on outcomes they can't fully control (making the starting lineup, averaging X points per game), they set themselves up for confidence crashes.

What works better:

• Set process goals they control: "I'll take 50 free throws after every practice"
• Focus on improvement metrics: "Increase my defensive stops from 2 to 4 per game"
• Create skill-based targets: "Master the hesitation dribble by season's end"
• Celebrate progress toward goals, not just achievement of them

When players see themselves getting better at things within their control, confidence grows naturally and sustainably.

2. Build Competence Through Small, Achievable Wins

Confidence requires experience of success to grow—not experience of perfection, but experience of genuine accomplishment. One of the most effective approaches is breaking down long-term objectives into smaller, manageable tasks.

In practice:

• Create skill progressions where players master one level before advancing
• Design drills where success is achievable but earned (aim for that 85% success rate in practice)
• Track specific improvements: "You're now making contact on box-outs 7 out of 10 times, up from 4"
• Let them see their own progress through video, stats, or simple tracking

I've seen players transform when they realize they're actually getting better at specific things, even if the scoreboard doesn't always reflect it yet.

3. Teach Them to Manage Self-Talk

The way players think leads to how they feel—negative self-talk directly destroys confidence. This includes both direct self-talk ("I suck," "I can't do this") and indirect self-talk ("This team looks too good," "Coach seems disappointed").

Practical strategies:

• Help players identify their negative thought patterns
• Teach replacement phrases: Instead of "I always miss these," try "I've made this shot before"
• Practice positive self-talk during drills, not just games
• Model constructive self-talk yourself—players watch how you talk to yourself

The internal dialogue matters more than most players (and coaches) realize. When I was playing, my self-talk was brutal. I would never have spoken to a teammate the way I spoke to myself.

4. Create Practice Situations That Build Pressure Tolerance

Confidence comes from successfully handling pressure, not from avoiding it. But we need to build pressure tolerance gradually, not throw players into the deep end.

How to do this:

• Start with low-pressure competitive drills
• Gradually increase stakes (losers run, winners get water break first, etc.)
• Simulate game situations: "We're down 2 with 30 seconds left"
• Let players experience pressure, succeed OR fail, then process what happened
• Celebrate players who attempt challenging situations, regardless of outcome

The more comfortable players become in pressure situations during practice, the more confident they'll be when those situations arise in games.

5. Focus Feedback on Effort and Improvement, Not Just Results

How we give feedback dramatically impacts confidence. Research consistently shows that recognizing effort and self-improvement helps athletes feel competent and improves their perceived performance.

The right approach:

• Be specific: "Your footwork on that closeout was textbook" beats "good defense"
• Recognize effort before correcting technique
• Separate the person from the performance: "That shot wasn't your best" not "You're a bad shooter"
• Ask questions that help them self-correct: "What did you notice about your balance on that shot?"
• Publicly praise effort and improvement; privately coach technique

I've learned that players will work on what they believe they can improve. When feedback focuses only on what's wrong, they start believing they can't improve at all.

6. Help Them Develop a "Bounce-Back" Routine

Young athletes struggle most with bouncing back from mistakes when confidence is low. Confident players have routines that help them reset quickly.

Teach them to:

• Develop a physical reset (deep breath, adjust shoe, touch the floor)
• Use a replacement thought: "Next play" or "I got this"
• Focus forward, not backward: What's the next right action?
• Keep neutral body language—don't advertise the mistake to everyone

Derek Jeter said, "Every time you go up, you have to have a good feeling. You have to think you're going to get a hit. If you don't, you're out before you even go to the plate."

That mindset doesn't happen by accident. We have to teach players how to reset their confidence after setbacks.

7. Reduce Social Approval Dependency

When confidence is based on other people's opinions and reactions, it becomes very fragile. Players who need constant external validation never develop genuine inner confidence.

How to build internal confidence:

• Ask them to evaluate their own performance before you do
• Focus on their personal standards, not comparisons to teammates
• Teach them to separate playing time decisions from their worth as players
• Reduce post-game praise/criticism—let the experience settle first
• Help them identify what THEY think makes them a good player

When I was playing, I was completely dependent on external validation. If a coach wasn't praising me constantly, I assumed I was doing something wrong. That's exhausting and unsustainable.

8. Create a Mistake-Tolerant Environment

Sports psychologists emphasize that creating an atmosphere where mistakes are accepted and embraced helps players feel comfortable taking risks. Fear of making mistakes is one of the fastest paths to tentative, unconfident play.

In your gym:

• Explicitly tell players that mistakes are expected and welcomed as learning opportunities
• Model this yourself—acknowledge your coaching mistakes openly
• Never make players feel stupid for trying something and failing
• Celebrate aggressive mistakes more than passive ones
• Create "mistake of the week" awards for players who tried something bold

The biggest regret from my playing days is how many shots I didn't take, how many moves I didn't try, how many times I played it safe because I was afraid to mess up. Don't let your players waste years like I did.

The Confidence-Competence Loop

Here's what I've learned: confidence and competence feed each other. When players gain competence (actual skill), their confidence grows. When their confidence grows, they attempt more challenging things, which builds more competence. It's a virtuous cycle.

But it can also be a vicious cycle in reverse. When players lack confidence, they play tentatively, which prevents them from developing competence, which further erodes confidence.

As coaches, our job is to create the conditions where the virtuous cycle can begin—or restart.

Where to Start

Do you have one ore more players who seems to lack confidence? Watch them carefully and ask yourself: which confidence killer is affecting them most? Self-doubt? Fear? Perfectionism? Negative self-talk?

Maybe you help them set a small, achievable goal. Maybe you teach them a reset routine. Maybe you just create space for them to make mistakes without judgment.

What I've found is that confidence rarely appears all at once. It builds gradually, through small successes, better self-talk, and the repeated experience of "I can do this."

That shift I experienced after high school—when I finally realized I could compete—didn't happen because I suddenly got more skilled. It happened because the mental barriers came down. The doubt, the fear, the constant self-criticism... it all loosened its grip just enough for me to see what was possible.

Your players don't need to wait until after their playing days are over to discover what they're capable of. You can help them find that confidence now, while it still matters most.

Share your confidence-building wins in the Hoop Leaders community—what's worked for you when helping a player break through that confidence barrier? Let's learn from each other so more players discover their potential while they still have time to use it.

References & Further Reading

• Top Confidence Killers for Athletes: Success Starts Within - Comprehensive Guide
• What Hurts Young Athletes' Confidence in Sports: Youth Sports Psychology
• The Science of Building Athletic Confidence in Youth Athletes: Psychology Today Article
• Harwood, C. G., & Knight, C. J. (2015): Parenting in youth sport: A position paper on parenting expertise. Psychology of Sport and Exercise, 16, 24-35.
• Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000): The "what" and "why" of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227-268.